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Oh boy, I just got my packet to reapply to be a substitute teacher for yet another fun filled year of Edutainment. I can't wait to start covering fridays and mondays for all the coaches who need to "watch game films" or other very important activities for their first love of coaching rather than being an educator.
Now I must say that I have encountered some teachers who are dynamic educators who are truly hesitant to take a half-day off let alone a full day. From these gems I try to take away any nuggets of information they may leave with their lesson plans so that maybe someday I'll be able to use them in my own classroom. Of course there are others who leave sub plans that resemble a hurried phone number written on a cocktail napkin, or in some cases there are entire scripts that you are expected to follow to the letter - dry, boring, forced edutainment that you can ladle out like so much mystery meat in the lunch room.
There are two assignments that invariably end up on the substitute plan: Videos and worksheets. For the longest time I hated both of them. I never really got to exercise my teaching chops by handing out volumes of worksheets or plugging in video after video and I looked forward to the rare teacher who took a chance with a substitute and actually left a "real" LP. Of course it was much better in Social Studies classes - an area that I am over-qualified to teach in part because I really like history! Huh, go figure.
Anyway, Now that I've been subbing for a while I tend to look forward to the videos and although I still absolutely HATE worksheets I accept that they are here to stay in that intricate complex that is the American education system. Why do I hate them so much you ask? At first blush worksheets are wonderful tools to help guide students through their assignments, especially beneficial in math class, however, in history and social studies they have degenerated into a vapid activity for students that tends to improve their ability to "cherry pick" information from their text without establishing a basis or continuity of information. It's even worse if students are allowed to partner up while doing worksheets. Instead of collaborative learning they tend to divvy up the assignment so that they tend to find less than 50% of the desired information. Larger study groups = less information gained. And as a substitute you have to stand there and watch it happen.
I've seen students from 6th through 12th graders in dozens of schools use this technique and sadly many teachers reinforce this lack o' learnin' by allowing study notes for tests. I saw this technique for the first time when I student taught in Tacoma and I was appalled by the cavalier attitude this team of teachers had towards history. Their preferred method of instruction was to lecture from their notes as they wrote all the key points on a chalk board after which they told the kids that if they copied down everything on the board that they would ace the unit quiz because they were allowed to use their notes during the test! These long-time "educators" dismissed my concern about incorrect information being doled out with the comment, "well, don't worry about it, you're the only one who knows the right answer."
Of course I'm talking about history because that's my thing, I enjoy history and historical scholarship so indifference (or incompetence) in teaching history is an anathema for me. History and it's Frankenstein's monster of a cousin: social studies should be taught by history teachers, not coaches!
It seems that there are only two kinds of history teachers: coaches and social revisionists. If you were looking for that old eccentric history teacher who knows enough history to have just maybe have marched with Sherman you won't find them in the public school system - anywhere.
If you talk to college history professors they will almost unanimously agree that the average freshman enters college with a tremendous lack of basic knowledge of research techniques, history or civics. I must agree with them as I was asked to be a Teaching Assistant for an upper level college class (300 level) while I was student teaching. Yeah, I'm a glutton for punishment! Anyway, I was grading papers at both the high school senior and the college junior levels at about the same time and in many cases the only way I could tell them apart was the subject matter!
Anyway, it's been eight years since I got my teaching certification - haven't even had the whiff of a job yet. I did get two mercy interviews at the school where my wife works though. I've been certified so long I've gone through two basic licenses (in two different states) as well as a third substitute license! As I see it I've got 8 years of no experience under my belt with little chance of ever having my own classroom.
Here's a kicker, my current license will expire in two years so I do hope that something comes along before I have to hand the state another $85 to continue to be a sub. I'll continue to work towards a full-time (I'd take part-time) position teaching history, I'd even call it social studies if I could get a permanent gig!
What's working against me you ask? Well, I seriously don't know for sure. It certainly isn't my credentials, I am fully endorsed in all aspects of history and social studies so it isn't that. One major strike against me is that I now have a Masters Degree. I've now become too expensive as a novice teacher for some school districts - at least that's what I'm told. Of course there is the inevitable problem of not being a coach. Sorry, never played organized sports, never really liked them either.
This brings me to the intangibles, the points that no one talks about, are afraid to even hint about but are truly deal breakers. I suffer from a few terminal maladies that can never be cured: I'm too old, too white, too male, too conservative and too damn independent for a school district to take a chance on me! Of course this added to not being a coach makes me unemployable and quite frankly untouchable.
As I read back over this diatribe, I hesitate to post it for school administrators to read but then again what's going to happen? They're not going to hire me? They are already not doing that so what's the difference?
With all that said, I will continue to teach within the limits that I work under and I'll try to touch the handful of kids who seem to like me as a teacher because I'm "not like other substitutes," their words not mine. One girl once told me she didn't like it when I subbed because I was too smart, that she liked dumb substitutes. There was a a twinkle in her eye when she said it though...
Ancora Imparo!
